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Intentional Leader with Cal WaltersAuthor: Cal Walters
Let's be honest. The hardest person you will ever have to lead is the person you look at in the mirror everyday. Self-leadership is the most important thing we do as leaders, but it's hard. And it hasn't gotten any easier in a world of smart phone addiction, social media comparison, global pandemics, and information overload (just to name a few obstacles). That's why Intentional Leader exists. We help leaders take the guesswork out of self-leadership, fight a reactionary lifestyle, accelerate their personal growth, and achieve their God-given potential at home, at work, and in their communities. This is why we get out of bed each morning. We love helping leaders on their personal growth journey! Because we know when the leader gets better everyone benefits. Organizations, communities, and families all thrive when the leader is thriving. We are a team of ordinary people with an extraordinary passion for personal growth and helping leaders thrive. Join this community to pursue personal growth and leadership excellence, to inspire others, and make a lasting impact on the world. Life is short, so let's make it count by living an intentional life. On this podcast, Cal Walters a follower of Jesus, a husband, father, West Point graduate, former Infantry Officer, Army Ranger, combat veteran, lawyer, and Army JAG passionately explores ways to live intentionally, make each day count, and lead with greater influence and impact. Cal firmly believes leadership matters, and this podcast will help you lead yourself and inspire others. Cal believes we each have a unique contribution to make to the world, and he wants to help you make yours! For show notes, visit https://www.calwalters.me/ Disclaimer: The views expressed on this podcast are those of the author and guests and do not reflect the official policy, position, or endorsement of the US Army JAG Corps, US Army, DoD, or the US Government. Language: en Genres: Business, Education, Management, Self-Improvement Contact email: Get it Feed URL: Get it iTunes ID: Get it |
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135: Dr. Jeff Wetzler — Why People Don't Tell You the Truth (and the Questions That Change Everything)
Thursday, 5 March, 2026
➡️ Get my free weekly newsletter (The Intentional Letter): https://courses.calwalters.me/signup Follow Jeff's work: https://www.jeffwetzler.com/ Dr. Jeff Wetzler, author of Ask, joins Cal Walters to unpack a leadership blind spot: the crucial information your team has… but isn't telling you. Jeff explains the "left-hand column" (what people think and feel but don't say), the four reasons honesty gets filtered, and the ASK Approach—a practical framework for choosing curiosity, building psychological safety, asking better questions, and closing the loop when feedback is hard to act on. If you want better decisions, healthier relationships, and fewer surprises, this conversation will give you a playbook. Episode Outline / Timestamps 00:00 The hidden information problem 00:41 Guest intro + what you'll learn 01:37 Chris Argyris + the "left-hand column" tool 08:07 Four reasons people don't tell you the truth 12:06 Why smart/successful leaders struggle to learn 13:55 Jeff's near miss: one question that revealed the truth 15:45 Psychological safety: why curiosity alone isn't enough 21:35 Reactivity: the biggest predictor of future honesty 22:18 Responding well to hard feedback 25:00 The ASK Approach: Choose curiosity 29:48 Curiosity killers + "When you're furious, get curious" 32:29 Busy leaders: "Pay now or pay later" 36:40 Quality questions vs. crummy questions 40:04 Better questions for feedback and performance reviews 44:07 Go-to questions for parties and relationships 47:48 Questions as a gift: helping others gain clarity 49:55 How to handle feedback you won't follow 51:08 Reflect & reconnect: sift it, turn it, and close the loop 53:13 Cal's takeaways and practical challenges Practical Challenges to Try This Week Replace: "Do you have feedback for me?" With: "What's one thing I could do differently that would make your life easier?" When you feel defensive, ask one question before making a statement. When someone brings hard truth, try: "That's hard to hear—and I'm really glad you told me."
