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Porn, Betrayal, Sex and the Experts PBSEAuthor: Steve Moore & Mark Kastleman
Two sex addicts in long-term successful recovery are ALSO world-class Counselors who specialize in porn and sex addiction recovery. Drawing on 40 years of combined personal and professional experience, Mark and Steve get RAW and REAL about HOW to overcome addiction, heal betrayal trauma and save your marriage. If you're struggling with addictionwe get it. Recovery is hard. We've been there. We'll help you take the fight to your addiction like never before. If you're married to an addictwe KNOW what it's like to nearly destroy a marriage! We'll help you understand the world of your husband's addiction and begin healing your betrayal trauma, regardless of what he decides to do. You don't have to stay stuck. You don't have to keep suffering. We've made all the mistakes so you don't have to. Take back your life. Take back your marriage. Let's do this together! This is the PBSE podcast. Language: en-us Genres: Health & Fitness, Mental Health, Sexuality Contact email: Get it Feed URL: Get it iTunes ID: Get it |
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CASE STUDY: He was in solid recovery and He just LIED again! Now What???
Episode 357
Monday, 2 November, 2026
(Episode 357) What happens when a recovering porn/sex addict has seemingly been doing everything right—maintaining sobriety, completing therapeutic disclosure, engaging in recovery, and rebuilding trust with his betrayed partner—only to relapse and return to LYING?! In this PBSE case study, we examine a couple whose progress is shattered when the husband relapses during a business trip and conceals the truth for weeks, even during their daily coupleship check-ins. We explore why, for many betrayed partners, the deception is far more devastating than the relapse itself. Another lie can reactivate years of betrayal trauma, bring the entire relationship history into question, and destroy the partner's sense of emotional safety. Perhaps most tragically, repeated deception can cause her to lose confidence not only in her husband but also in her own judgment, intuition, and ability to recognize reality.Why would a man who has made genuine progress in recovery return to the very behaviors that caused so much destruction? We examine the powerful role of FEAR—fear of judgment, accountability, consequences, rejection, and confronting one's own inadequacies. We also explore how unresolved shame, low self-worth, emotional avoidance, and a gradual breakdown in healthy recovery habits can create vulnerability to relapse and renewed dishonesty. But reasons are NOT excuses! Genuine recovery requires much more than sobriety. The addict must take FULL responsibility for his choices, confront the deeper thinking and emotional patterns driving his behavior, and proactively demonstrate honesty, transparency, and accountability without expecting his partner to manage his recovery. Meanwhile, the betrayed partner must resist the understandable urge to control his choices and instead focus on reclaiming her own healing, identifying her deepest values and needs, establishing healthy boundaries, and rebuilding trust in herself.So where does the coupleship go from here? Is another betrayal the end of the relationship, or can genuine trust and connection eventually be restored? We explain why trying to "fix the marriage" too soon can create additional harm when individual recovery and healing work has not yet established sufficient safety. Instead, both individuals must take ownership of their separate journeys and gradually determine where authentic collaboration is possible. This includes establishing clear boundaries, creating structured and emotionally safe communication, addressing defensiveness and withdrawal, and carefully examining what emotional and physical intimacy mean following another betrayal. The goal isn't simply to get the marriage back to where it was—it's to determine whether both individuals can build something healthier, more honest, and more authentic than before. While another relapse and renewed deception do not automatically erase previous recovery progress, genuine hope must be grounded in truth, personal responsibility, consistent action, and respect for each individual's right to choose their own path forward.For a full transcript of this podcast in article format, go to: CASE STUDY: He was in solid recovery and He just LIED again! Now What???Learn more about Mark and Steve's revolutionary online porn/sexual addiction recovery and betrayal trauma healing program at—daretoconnectnow.comFind out more about Steve Moore at: Ascension CounselingLearn more about Mark Kastleman at: Reclaim Counseling Services
