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Delight in Parenting with Dajana YoakleyEmpowering parents with peaceful strategies for harmony at home, 'Delight in Parenting with Dajana Yoakley' is your guide to a joy-filled family life. Author: Empowering parents with peaceful & playful strategies to bring the delight back into parenting. 'Delight in Parenting with Dajana Yoakley' is your guide to a thriving family life.
Welcome to Delight in Parenting Podcast. Let's into the essence of peaceful, playful and emotionally intelligent parenting, where I share the insights, expert advice & research, and support necessary to transform your parenting approach from struggling to delighting. Say goodbye to conflict and embrace cooperation, creating a more joyful home environment. Join me as we embark on a path to deeper connection and more peace & play within our families. I'm excited to connect and share this journey with you through each episode! delightinparenting.substack.com Language: en Genres: Education, Kids & Family, Parenting, Self-Improvement Contact email: Get it Feed URL: Get it iTunes ID: Get it |
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71. The meltdown → defiance cycle (and what’s actually going on and how to handle it)
Thursday, 16 April, 2026
What if the meltdown isn’t the problem?What if the defiance… the pushback… the shutting down…is actually your child’s nervous system asking for help?Because for so many parents, it feels like this:→ It starts small→ It escalates fast→ Suddenly you’re in a full meltdown or power struggle→ And nothing you try seems to workYou explain.You stay calm.You set a consequence.…and somehow, it just gets worse.In my latest podcast episode, I sat down with Ce Eshelman, a trauma-informed therapist, and she put words to something so many parents feel—but can’t quite explain.She calls these moments “bewildering behaviors.”Those reactions that feel confusing… intense… disproportionate.The ones where you walk away thinking:“Why did that get so big?”“Why didn’t anything work?”“What am I missing?”And the answer isn’t what most of us were taught.Here are 3 shifts from our conversation:1. It’s not defiance—it’s dysregulationWhen your child melts down, their brain is overwhelmed.They’re not choosing how to respond in that moment.They’re reacting.Which is why logic, consequences, and explanations don’t land.2. Behavior is a signal, not the problemThat meltdown? That pushback?It’s communication.Something inside your child feels too big, too fast, or too overwhelming to manage alone.3. Understanding isn’t enough in the momentEven when you get all of this…it’s still incredibly hard to know what to actually DO when it’s happening in real life.Because your nervous system gets activated too.And suddenly you’re reacting… instead of responding.🎙️ Click here to listen to the full podcast episode and hear how Ce breaks this down in a way that makes these moments finally make sense.To learn more about Ce Eshelman:https://www.lovemattersparenting.com/aboutWant more support?If you’re listening to this and thinking, “This is exactly what’s happening in my home… but I still don’t know what to do or say in the moment,” you’re not alone.I’m hosting a free workshop where I’ll walk you through exactly this—how to stay calm when your child is escalating, what to do and say in those meltdown moments, and how to shift the pattern so it stops turning into defiance and power struggles.👉 Big Feelings Challenging Behavior WorkshopYou don’t have to keep guessing your way through these moments. You’re not alone in this! Join us to get the support you need.Connect with Dajana Yoakley Delight in ParentingStep #1: Get the 3 Steps to Reset Your Nervous System FREE Guide.Step #2: Connect With The FREE Facebook Community.Step #3: Follow me on Social Media:https://www.instagram.com/delightinparenting/https://www.facebook.com/delightinparentingcoaching/www.youtube.com/@DelightinParentinghttps://www.linkedin.com/in/delightinparenting/ This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit delightinparenting.substack.com/subscribe
