A Mediocre Time with Tom and Dan

Author: Tom Vann & Dan Dennis

Tom and Dan were once sitting in a hotel room in Daytona Beach, Florida where the air-condition didn't work, they were out of beer, and the cable only had 2 channels that came in static free. One of their friends suggested that they leave and attempt to find something better to do to which Dan replied "Why would we want to ruin a mediocre time?" If you were to ask "Tom and Dan" what the meaning of life is, they might tell you that there is none. Born from a feeling that nothing in life truly matters and that for the most part we're all surrounded by scumbags, "Tom and Dan" figured out that there's only one true constant in life; laughter. How did they come to that conclusion? It's all they have. You see, just like the mass majority of us, "T & D" have day jobs and it was at said day job where they cued in on the fact that some of the greatest laughs came at the end of the day. There's just something about the relaxed feeling of knowing that you have very little time left at work to put in. Maybe it's the "punch drunkenness" of still being at work; no one is quite sure. There they sat in their office, the door shut to their co-workers and management, only making each other laugh to the point of tears. Finally they realized that it might not be such a bad idea to roll tape on these conversations. Why not? They would be having them anyway, taped or not, and it was fun. Both of them come from rather lengthy broadcasting careers so setting up a home studio wasn't so hard to do. And with the addition of Ross, the consummate straight man and "News Dad", things got even more "mediocre." Broadcasting since 2009 has garnered a rather extensive following for "T & D" with loyal "scumbags" (as their listeners are affectionately known) checking in from all across the world. Hundreds of shows under their belts and winners of the Orlando Weekly's "Best of Orlando 2011" for "Best Kept Secret" reassures them both that yesno one is listening! (Best Kept Secret? HA!)
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Language: en

Genres: Comedy, Improv

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857 - Wal-Mart Maserati
Friday, 9 January, 2026

• Sponsor read for MyEternalVitality.com with Dr. Powers • Gut health testing to identify individual histamine triggers • Relief that shrimp is not a histamine trigger • "Healthy" foods like spinach and kale causing inflammation • Improving digestion, regularity, and reducing stomach discomfort • Food reactions differing by individual body chemistry • Hormone testing becoming more important with age • Declining testosterone levels in men • Men getting hormone testing through Dr. Powers • Benefits of hormone replacement therapy • Improved libido, energy, and mental clarity • Symptoms of imbalance: fatigue, brain fog, hot flashes, low libido • Hormones discussed: estrogen, progesterone, testosterone, cortisol • Free Dr. Powers consultation for Tom & Dan listeners • Dr. Powers as a fan of the show and BDM member • New year framed as a time to address health • Show intro from the Just Call Moe Studio • Welcome to the Friday Free Show of A Mediocre Time • First show of 2026 and confusion adjusting to the year • Show running 17 years since 2009 • Jokes about reaching the 20th anniversary • Commitment to continuing the show regardless of profit • Guest Savannah appearing on the first show of 2026 • Being more cautious about what's said on air • Forgetting how large the audience actually is • Anxiety about saying something regrettable • Joke about an old onion-skin fart story • Comparing influencer audiences to radio audiences • Discussion of online backlash and hate comments • Wanting reactions but rarely receiving criticism • Shoutout to video editor Melissa • Opening Christmas gifts from Melissa on air • Melissa's self-deprecating note and affectionate appreciation • Big Johnson Key West shirt gift • Jokes about wearing tiny or "baby" shirts • "Where's Bumfardo?" shirt explained • Bumfardo described as a legendary Key West grifter • Reference to a podcast episode about Bumfardo • Clarifying Bumfardo as a criminal firefighter • Gratitude and appreciation for Melissa • Living in Key West after California • Living in an Airstream on sponsor property • Romantic idea vs reality of Airstream living • Millionaires hosting guests in RVs or guest houses • Restored and comfortable Airstream • Living with a pet monitor lizard • Joking about the start of a "lizard journey" • Lizard eating pulled pork and seafood • Joke comparing lizard diet to Jeff Foxworthy • Lizard free-roaming inside the Airstream • Lizard unusually clean and well-behaved • Lizard now living at Gatorland • Using a doggie door and daily routine • Monitor lizard about six feet long • Question about reptile cleanliness myths • Hygiene concerns when handling reptiles • Lizard attacked at night in Key West • Iguanas or raccoons suspected • Bringing the lizard indoors for safety • Emergency super glue used to close a wound • Super glue working on reptile scales • Owning many exotic pets over the years • Large python kept in a one-bedroom apartment • Python named Benji • Hybrid reticulated/Burmese python • Python reaching 13–14 feet long • Bathing a python in a bathtub • Snake suddenly becoming aggressive • Snake striking when door opened • Trapping the snake in the bathroom • Child reacting to apex predators in the apartment • Sending the kid outside for safety • Question of whether pythons can seriously injure people • Preventing snake escape through a window • Subduing the snake with a quilt • Wrestling and restraining the python • Snake aggression being a one-time incident • Snakes being unpredictable • Gateway exotic pets like Pac-Man frogs • Still owning a frog • Childhood fascination with reptiles • Catching and keeping reptiles in South Carolina • Childhood "zoo" with animals in drawers • Joke about kids now having digital pets instead of real ones • Feeding large pythons big rats • Debate over live vs pre-killed feeding • Some snakes needing movement to eat • Parenting rule against exotic pets for kids • Requiring responsibility before allowing pets • Travel complications of pet ownership • Personal hamster care experience • Dad raising guinea pigs • Guinea pigs named after dictators and NASCAR drivers • Greg Biffle and Waltrip jokes • Comedy bit about guinea pig personalities • Story about Jim Colbert's Daryl Waltrip impression • Late-night drunk texts from Jim Colbert • Joke about inappropriate texts and photos • Clarifying a misspoken offensive term • Transition to Savannah's Jamaica trip • Comparison to a past Australia trip • Savannah described as highly traveled • Gatorland Global raising nearly $10,000 for hurricane relief • Shipping aid supplies to Jamaica • Bottlenecks at Jamaican ports • Long-term recovery continuing after news cycle moves on • Using funds in practical ways • Helping communities near Hope Zoo in Kingston • Providing water storage and bathroom supplies • Kids previously walking long distances for water • Purchasing a water truck • "Practical conservation" approach • Helping people so animals can be cared for • Zoo animals surviving the hurricane • Oxygen mask analogy • Dark humor about survival priorities • One-week stay in Jamaica • Challenges traveling post-hurricane • Relying on local relationships • Praise for Jamaican kindness • Airbnb hosts offering help and discounts • Importance of global relationships • Transition to friendship with Jackie Siegel • Clarifying which Jackie is being discussed • Jokes about famous Jackies • How Savannah met Jackie Siegel • Savannah's ease connecting with people • Standing out due to appearance and style • Personal recognizability as a brand • Jokes about recognizability • Fascination with ultra-wealthy lifestyles • Meeting Jackie through Real Radio • Seeing Jackie at Runway to Hope • Runway to Hope supporting kids with cancer • Walking the runway with sponsored children • Jackie filming at Gatorland • Friendship forming through time together • Difficulty wealthy people have making friends • Trust and motive issues around rich people • Jackie portrayed as kind and trusting • Idea of rich people seen as "lottery tickets" • Influence of who you spend time with • Being around Jackie compared to a soap opera • Observing Jackie's priorities and behavior • Jackie's Broadway show ending • Show based on Jackie's life • Proving critics wrong theme • Love story with David Siegel • Interest in Broadway and musicals • Wanting to take Maisie to NYC shows • Connecting Maisie's dance to Broadway interest • Kristen Chenoweth playing Jackie • Primer on Kristen Chenoweth • Wicked, Glinda, and Ariana Grande comparison • Stephen Schwartz writing the show • Jackie focused on crew losing jobs • Wanting to help displaced cast and crew • Listing backstage jobs affected • Empathy for workers over producers • Learning about Jackie's past domestic violence • Public perception not matching her full story • Misconceptions about billionaires • Assumption wealthy people should give endlessly • Overlooking effort behind wealth • Jackie having many children • Incorrect belief she married into money • Comparison to Melinda Gates • Emphasis on partnerships building wealth • David Siegel's death last year • Attending his celebration of life • Repeated cycles of success and bankruptcy • Successful people often failing many times • How David built his fortune • Origin of Westgate • David's early acting dreams • Buying land near Disney World • Purchasing a rundown hotel • Discovering the timeshare concept • Starting his own timeshare business • Joke about stealing ideas • Shoutout to women who support the show • Transition to music segment • Punk band Paradox featured • Song "I'm the Outside" • Call-in number and email plug • Sponsor read for BudDocs • Medical marijuana card process explained • Same-day appointments and telemedicine follow-ups • Dispensary deals and education • Cannabis for pain after hip replacement • Using marijuana to reduce alcohol • Return from break with Savannah • Plug for visiting Gatorland • New attractions constantly added • Arrival of Siamese crocodiles • Crocodiles kept separately • Transport from Korea to Gatorland • Animal relocation to avoid euthanasia • Cultural differences in cleanliness and order • "Tokyo depression" concept • Driving and horn etiquette differences • Safari travel mention • South Africa affordability note • Wealth spectrum discussion • Story about driving a Maserati to Walmart • Navigating wealthy social spaces authentically • Jackie's daughter Victoria's overdose • Victoria's Voice organization • Addiction treatment and Narcan advocacy • Turning tragedy into public good • Playing the clown at rich dinners • Observing human behavior like animal behavior • Studying power, money, and authority • Press box story with Phil Rawlins • Meeting Cedric the Entertainer and George Lopez • Importance of introductions and social proof • Savannah blending into elite spaces • Declaring 2026 a takeover year • Goal to make Gatorland the top park globally • Growth plans for conservation, YouTube, and TV • Using affirmations despite mocking them • Reading motivational books • Social media burnout and algorithm frustration • Thumbnails mattering more than content • AI-generated animal videos misleading audiences • Desire for human-made content spaces • Posting more freely without chasing algorithms • Encouraging visits to Gatorland • Promoting BDM Appreciation Week • Wrapping the show with gratitude ### Social [https://tomanddan.com](https://tomanddan.com) [https://twitter.com/tomanddanlive](https://twitter.com/tomanddanlive) [https://facebook.com/amediocretime](https://facebook.com/amediocretime) [https://instagram.com/tomanddanlive](https://instagram.com/tomanddanlive) Listen AMT Apple: [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/a-mediocre-time/id334142682](https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/a-mediocre-time/id334142682) AMT Google: 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