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So Glad It's YouAuthor: Bridget KerMorris, JD, MA, & Leah Anne Borrell, M.Ed. Language: en Genres: Kids & Family, Parenting Contact email: Get it Feed URL: Get it iTunes ID: Get it Trailer: |
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Boys Are Bigger Than the Box We Put Them In: Raising Boys with Payal Desai
Episode 5
Thursday, 29 October, 2026
In 2023, a trend went around where moms taught their sons to cook so that some future wife would be impressed. Payal Desai flipped it: she taught her sons to clean up after themselves so that nobody spends a lifetime catering to them . . . and the flip went everywhere. The Tamron Hall Show, HuffPost, Business Insider, Parents. Close to half a million people follow her at @payalforstyle, where raising boys is a revolution. She taught middle school English in New Jersey for sixteen years, most of them eighth grade. She joins Bridget and Leah Anne for what's underneath the trend: what happens between sixth grade, when boys still cry at their desks and hug their friends, and ninth grade, when deep friendship has quietly stopped being cool.Payal is honest about the whole arc. She tells the story of her own gender disappointment . . . how a teacher who already knew boys are bigger than the box we put them in still reverted to her own bias the day she learned she was having a son. She talks about her last classroom years, when the manosphere reached her students and she realized she couldn't compete with an algorithm. And she tells the nail polish story, with a ten-year-old's answer that shows what confidence built at home sounds like.In this episode:The Dusty Sons flip: the original trend, her sister's one-line rewrite, and why it went everywhereSixth grade boys cry and hug their friends. Eighth grade boys mostly don't. What happens in between"I can't compete with your algorithm" . . . the manosphere reached her classroom before it reached the newsThe nail polish, the friends who asked why, and his answer: "It's not an insult, so why would I be insulted?"For the parent whose spouse says take it off: "Sit down and ask him about his boyhood"Try this week:Catch one box: notice a moment where "boys don't" or "boys can't" sneaks into your house, and get curious before deciding it's true.Offer the full menu: one activity your son hasn't been offered because of the label on it. Art counts. Let him show you who he is.When a choice worries you, name the fear to yourself first . . . then ask whose boyhood it belongs to.Quotes from Payal:"Boys are bigger than the box that we put them in.""They say raising boys is easier. It's only easier when you're not doing it.""Of course boys are relational."Find Payal Desai:Instagram: @payalforstyleHer Raising Boys merch drop, orders close November 2, click hereMentioned in this episode, BoyMom by Ruth WhippmanAbout So Glad It's YouSo Glad It's You is a show about the same kid in two rooms. Bridget KerMorris, a parent coach, takes the home side. Leah Anne Borrell, who spent 25 years in education, takes the classroom side. New episodes every Wednesday.Want more help with the home side and the school side? Our membership for parents of middle schoolers has short videos, word-for-word scripts and email templates, live Q&As, and a place to ask about your own kid: https://sogladitsyou.comFollow us on Instagram: @sogladitsyou · @bridget.sogladitsyou · @leahanne.sogladitsyouThis show is for education and encouragement. It is not a substitute for advice from your own doctor, therapist, or counselor.
