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Rug Burn
Episode 36
Tuesday, 1 September, 2026

Bob fixes the dryer, really, while Miles gives his work neighbor a Rorschach test. GAMES, like old-school games, play a few with the Static Radio twist here – https://www.staticradio.com/category/games/ Subscribe Random Show Click Below https://youtube.com/live/AM-WcL92ULc Bob fixes the dryer, really, while Miles gives his work neighbor a Rorschach test. Rug Burn Bad AI Transcript There you go. There you go. Thank you. Hey, everyone. This is Jebediah Yoder singing your favorite rap hits. This week, I will sing Up In Here by the great DMX. Let’s hear it, Jebediah. Your grandma’s going to be wishing you were fishing something. I don’t know. Let me digest your holes in your chest and… Maybe you need to print out the lyrics, Jebediah. I don’t know the lyrics. Jebediah doesn’t have printer. He doesn’t have to print out. Maybe you should get that hammer and chisel and a rock. I’ll have to talk to my son, Noah. Noah, you’re there. Oh, my God. Hey, everybody. Welcome, Orienta. We have… Yeah, I don’t know. It’s funny voice night tonight, everybody. Have to do a funny voice to be on the show tonight very funny so uh how’s everybody doing? It’s like 100 degrees around here hey a lot of ball sweat Yeah, it’s very sweaty. That’s for sure. I’d like trying not to be outside because it’s so oppressive.How about you, Miles? Is it hot in there? It is hot in the city tonight, Bob. Yeah. Hey, I read a statistic that people in Iowa are more likely to die of cancer, like they’re the fourth leading state out of the 50 for people dying of cancer. I think that actually is true, yes. Yeah, it is. It’s true. We’re right up there, yes. Yeah, you’re way up there. That’s for certain. Yeah. I wouldn’t be surprised. Man. Yeah. Yikes. What are you doing against that? But we’re 50th in autoerotic asphyxiation deaths. Oh, really? I don’t know. How’d that happen? I don’t know how that is. It’s really skewed. It’s weird. It makes no sense. Do you think there’s any kind of correlation between the two? Well, when you’re good at one, yes. I don’t know. I’ve got the cancer, but I’m not going to wank myself to death. I can’t do it. I’ve got prostate cancer. No wanking.It’s just me. Well, I hope you’re doing okay. Don’t drink the water. I think that’s the problem. Too late. I drink this freaking iced tea every day around here. Oh, my gosh. Boy, if you get the new Lipton Ivermectin blend, you’ll probably be all right. Oh, yeah. No, it will never happen. You’ll probably be fine. It takes care of the cancer, and the COVID, and a million other things that you could possibly run into, you know, brain-eating amoebas and all that kind of stuff. I choose death over taking a horse tranquilizer for my health. Really? Or a horse, not a tranquilizer, but a… Horse medicine? Be warmer, whatever the fuck it is. Be warmer, yeah. You know, I’ve always said, do they have the rural king up there by you? No, come on, we can’t afford that. You got Farm and Fleet?farm fleet some shit. Yeah. I don’t know perhaps yeah I’ve heard of it okay any one of those places I’ve mentioned, if you know, if the shit goes down, get yourself to one of the TSC tractor supply. Any one of those places is going to be your refuge. Whenever, you know, stuff starts going south. Oh, Because they have, number one, they have weapons. Yeah. They got medicine. Right. Now it’s for animals, but that’s okay. They got clothing and food that’ll last forever. Yeah. Because it’s all uber processed and like packaged individually. You know what I mean? And they got bait. I didn’t really put that much thought into it, but okay. Jail and otherwise. I’ve never seen that, but okay. That’s fine. No, I’ve always said if everything goes to hell, head right for the rural king and barricade yourself in there. You’ll be fine. It’s like that old James Brolin movie where he’s locked in that department store with those Dobermans. He’s got to kill him with their bows and arrows and stuff. Oh, yeah. That’s a great one.I was thinking more of Dawn of the Dead, but that’s okay with the zombies. I was thinking more of Killdozer, but I don’t know. He was in that as well. I love the 70s. I love the 70s. You know me. True enough. I fixed my dryer last night. You can fix anything. Well, from the looks on people’s faces inside this house, that would be a shocking statement, I think. Dad, shut up. You’re stupid, Dad. So the dryer was making this hellacious noise as if there were owls being crushed. Oh, God. And I’m like, well, let me look this up. Oh, Jesus. And sure enough, I figured out, well, there’s these little rollers in your dryer that hold the drum so it turns, you know, smoothly. Yeah. And sometimes their bearings go out and then they get stuck. And then, of course, it just goes… Anyway. Yeah. And so I’m like, well, just order me the parts. So we get the parts ordered, you know, and then they were supposed to show up, I don’t know, days ago or whatever. Anyway, they…I love how Amazon delivers on Sunday, which just blows my mind. You know, living my whole life where you don’t get any deliveries on Sunday. Right. Now, all of a sudden, Amazon’s like, fuck that. I’m delivering everything. And we get like three deliveries on Sunday. I’m like, what are these people doing in my house? They’re not allowed. It’s Sunday for Christ’s sake. Go home. Leave me alone. Don’t look behind that curtain. Yeah. Yeah. Quit looking in my window. Quit taking pictures of my porch, for Christ’s sake. I was thinking about more Wizard of Oz. Don’t look behind that curtain. Anyway, go ahead. So anyway, they deliver everything late on Sunday. As well, they work late on Sunday. I’m like, God, these poor people. Everything’s gone to hell as far as jobs and stuff. Right. You got to work late on Sunday? I mean, what kind of world are we living in? Anyway…They leave it there, and so I’m like, well, you know, I got to get this done, right? I watched a video on YouTube of this guy who bumbled through it, and I’m like, God damn, this guy is the worst. He had to take things apart like three. Like, why is this video the number one video for fixing a dryer? This guy basically took this thing apart like two or three times, and then, well, I had to start over again. Wow, Christ. Here’s the next house fire story. Jesus. Fuck. So it took him, he said it took him like an hour and a half. And I’m like, I’m not very good at this kind of stuff, right? So I like at least two hours, two and a half hours, I figured. And so I start, I dig into it. Yeah. Because basically you have to disassemble the dryer, right?Yeah, that seems hard. That’d be hard. Yeah, I know this is not. We’re out of Miles title territory. Yeah, about five minutes ago, I’m like, fuck, I don’t want to call the guy over immediately. Like, you fix it. Here’s 50 bucks. So I start taking it. I figure out and start taking apart. Now, the problem is the model that the guy in the video had is not the model that I have, of course. Oh, of course. Top of the line. So I got to figure out how to pop open this motherfucker. And so I finally get it apart. And actually, mine was better made because it had extra parts in the video they didn’t have holding things together, bracing and whatnot. And so I was like, hey, we paid top dollar for this. Yeah. This is great.You’re like a combination of Professor and Mr. Howell from Gilligan’s Island, I think. That’s right. Oh, my God. Lovey. Bring me my wrench, Lovey. No, I’m – so this gives me a throwback. I grew up being the wrench guy. Yeah. And I did not like it one goddamn bit. Right. Right. Because I was the youngest. And so my brother, my father, I was always the fetcher. I would fetch things. So now that I am the one, you know, I guess in command or whatever. Command. Yeah, in command. I do not have a fetcher usually. It’s a very rare occasion that I actually ask somebody to fetch me things. We’re busy. I just usually use that opportunity to take a break and get something to drink. You know what I mean? I was a gopher. Yes, thanks, Michael. And so I’ll take that opportunity when I have to go get the other wrench to go down, get something to drink, get something to eat or whatever, some chips or what have you. It’s just a little break at that point since I have to walk out to the garage and go get stuff. Waddle.Well, yeah. So the weird thing is I’m really not, I mean, you say I fix anything. I’m not a fixer, although I will try historically speaking, but as I’ve gotten older, I’m like really grouchy about these things. And I’m just like, I’m just going to do it. Oh, you’re getting your serious face. You get like your, your crunched up eyes. You get. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Yeah. I’m like Clint Eastwood of handyman. Yes. Yeah. I can’t whistle. Anyway. Trying to do the good, the bad, and the ugly there. Anyway, so I’m like, yeah, I’ll just do it. And everybody’s like, you can’t fix that. You can’t fix that. You know what I mean? It’s like, oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I’m going to fix this. It’s going to take a while because I don’t move very fast, but I’ll get it fixed. And what I’ve noticed is now…that I’m, you know, Mr. Gotta fix it. I’m also Mr. Always hurt myself. Oh, here we go. The bad knee. Here we go. No, no. Thankfully I did not hurt my, I am very careful on the knee. Yeah. I dropped the, uh, I had to take the whole front of the dryer off to get to this drum. I think the whole thing apart, take the front off. You can take this brace off, take the drum out. You got to take all this shit out. Right. Right. There’s not really much to a dryer that I found out. And I was like, God, you know, even though I got the best one, it looked like I paid too much probably. But anyway, I dropped one of the panels right on my hand. So now my hands all bruised up. I look like, you know, I don’t know what I look like. So it seems that just comes with the territory. You know what I mean? Yeah. Right. Yeah. I’m just like, I’m constantly bruised.And angry. You got city hands. That’s right. Hooper. Hooper drives the boat. I smashed my hand early on and then now my hand’s all black and blue. I literally have gloves out in the garage stationed in places so that i can remember to put them on so i will yeah up so much. Right. I did not bring them inside so my hands are all cut from, you know, the various metal things. Yeah. So I finally get it out. I get the little wheels off. I put the new wheels on, the little guide wheels. They all look like roller blade uh wheels sure sure polyurethane things and I get the thing back together. Yeah. Everything. And then that’s when I call my wife in, and I’m like, okay, plugging this in. We’re going to see if it works. Oh, do you need help? Well, I did ask her to vacuum behind there. Did she play that card, though, like,Oh, you should have called me. I would have helped. She didn’t play that card. I told her that I wasn’t going to get any, I wasn’t taking any help. Oh, okay. She didn’t do that fake, you know, like, Oh no, there was no fake. So she comes up. It’s like, Oh, I go, it works. No, it’s going to vacuum this thing out. You know, I cleaned the insides out really, really good. You know, Lint trap thing out really well. Cause I took it off. And, um, and so then it worked and she’s like, Oh my gosh, it works. You know? Yeah. Yeah. I’m like, yeah. That’s right. You know, I think there’s a position for you with a football organization and spring training. It’s just morale. Yeah, yeah. That’s me. No, it’s just like so, you know, demeaning. She’s yelling, he fixed it. I can’t believe it.The neighbors really don’t need to hear this. You know what I mean? Yeah, right. And then, of course, just to top it all off with all that embarrassment going on, these motherfucking exhaust hoses for these dryers are all pieces of shit. I swear, it’s like made out of… It’s even flimsier than the lunar module. You know what I mean? The little foil… Yes. Oh, my God. I go to hook everything back up. The fucking hose just kind of disintegrates. I had to finish tonight because I had to wait for the next Amazon delivery where the new stupid hose. Why don’t you just go to the hardware store or something? I have to work, Miles. I’m busy. Yeah, this guy makes like 200 fucking cartoons on AI every day. Yeah, then he’s like, I’m too busy. Don’t bother me. So anyway. Yeah, no answer. Yeah. I do make cartoons. 200 a day. At night, my spare time, I make cartoons.No, every day. I swear to God. So many. So then, here’s the kicker, and I feel terrible. I was supposed to judge the comedy contest last night, and I was fixing the fucking dryer. And I missed. You’re implausible. Sorry, folks. Oh, man. Wow. All my accomplishment was ruined between… I forgot, you know, I lost track of time and didn’t make the comedy contest. And then the other thing was my wife was just constantly belittling me while I fixed the fucking dryer. Oh, you’re special. who’s the angel of God? I knew you could do it. I did. I knew you could do it. Yeah. I dried some clothes and there was half. You’ve done a lot of stuff. That’s really impressed me though. You’re like, Oh, I put some new flooring in. I worked on the electric. I’m like, Oh yeah. I love, I love this guy does everything. I love to work on the electric. I’m, you know, I’m fine on the old electric. I do have, I got a quick story about electric, but it wasn’t me. Yeah. Yeah.I have to go into the office more now. I was at the office, and there was a bad outlet, and the guy came to fix it. Yeah. I’m sitting in my office. He’s bopping around outside. It’s like in a common area. He’s bopping around inside with this thing, and I’m sitting in my office working, and all of a sudden I hear, ah! I get up out of my chair. I run out to the hallway. I’m like, are you okay? Hey, man. He’s like, oh, nope. He threw his screwdriver and everything scattered across the floor. Oh, it’s fine. It’s fine. I’m like, you might want to go find the breakers somewhere, buddy. Yeah, maybe. He’s like, maybe. Yeah. That’s great. It was by one of my coworkers and I’m like looking at her and she’s like, I don’t know. I don’t know what’s going on. Do you work here? I go, I go, don’t let him touch you. I’ll be in your office next, honey. Yeah, that’s right. I’ll be over there. Pick that one. Lock your door. Lock your door. I couldn’t believe it. The guy shocked the shit out of himself. I swear to God. Anyhow, what’s going on with you, Miles? Uh,Well, I didn’t have quite that exciting time. You didn’t fix the dryer or nothing? No, I did not fix anything. This actually happened today, though. I got a new manager in, and he’s trying to spruce up the auto parts store a little bit, buying this and that. Rock auto. They give him a little bit of a stipend or whatever. Really? Yeah. Then he’s unloading all this stuff. He’s putting stuff together. This guy’s really handy. Flat pack for my keys or something? Yeah, I don’t know. Shit just keeps showing up. I’m like, man, this guy’s a credit card. This guy’s burning it up here. I know. I’m trying to figure out how to get autographs off his credit card. I’m like, man, if he could pay for some tickets or something, that would be great. I’ve got to go see the bags.so you’re like a grateful dead fan with these bears. I swear to God. Hey, I know. I know. Fish. That is me. That is me. That is me. Excuse me. So, uh, right before we close, uh, he’s like, I gotta leave early. Uh, I’ll just put together some more stuff tomorrow, but he goes, I put out like, why did he make you put it together? No, he likes it. He enjoys stuff. He’s like a real guy like you. He just likes to jump into it. I know. I always put stuff together. I put stuff together. He doesn’t curse like I would. I’d be cursing, you know. Oh, no, I never. I didn’t curse once. Oh, I curse all the time. Like, fuck it. I curse more at night than I did putting together the dryer. Yeah, no, he’s really calm, cool. Like, okay, yeah.He’s like, hey, I got to leave early. I got some stuff going on. I said, okay. He goes, but I unpacked some stuff and I bought this big rug. Not sure why I did, but I kind of threw it out there in the lobby. I’m like, okay, that’s fine. Who doesn’t like a big rug? Yeah, a big rug. It’s a nice big rug. I’m like, okay, big. He’s heading out the door. I’m like, wow, this fucking rug looks weird. What’s wrong with it? It’s like black and white. It’s like a giant, like row shot test or something. I’m like, what the fuck is this? It’s from the John Holmes collection. Yeah. I’m like, wow, this is a weird, you know, and I’m looking at it. I’m looking at the middle. I go, God damn. I’m like, that looks like a face.This looks like a fucking like space in this rug. I like, my God, this could be like the shot of Torin or something. I’m like freaked out. Like I did not even want to stand on the rug. I was so freaked out. I’m like, man, I, there’s gotta be some bad juju or something, man. There’s something not right with his rug. Right. Yeah. Now I’m taking pictures. I’m trying to text people. I know like Billy Bob Thornton in the middle of this rug. Yeah. Hey, you like taters? And, uh, excuse me. So, you know, when you have something real funny or hot, you know, you want to text people, you know, like no one has their phone on. I’m texting people like no response. They all had their phone. They all had it. Trust me. Yeah. Like, uh, no miles. Fuck you. That was my mom. She’s like, what is he saying?sitting around was that weird? What is that a some kind of porno? So I’m like, okay, well, darn it. You know, like, man, funny. Like, there’s a whole, like larry david episode or something. It was like, man, you know, there’s a whole curb thing or something, you know, as i take some pictures and stuff like, fuck. All right, screw it. And I go, okay, one person has to acknowledge this, that you didn’t send it to me. Well, you’re not really a friend. So I didn’t, um, So I just kidding. I’m just kidding. The rock picture. I would probably respond. I didn’t want to ruin it. Well, I thought this was developing into a story, so I didn’t want to ruin the story. So I go, you know what? I’ll go over to our neighbor, the vintage jeans place. And, uh,Because no one ever shops there. It’s the glory of Vanderbilt. Yeah, like no one ever shops. I don’t know how this stays open, but no one’s there. And I go, it’s a front. It’s a front for something. So I go, I’m going to go talk to the manager there. Okay. I go, she’s my age. Yeah. She really likes me. He does. He does. Miles. She’s always like, Miles, when can I get you in a pair of jeans? Like, yeah. When you walk, your ass is like two cats in a bag. Like two schoolboys fighting. Look at that. And so I go, okay, I will go see Kathy. I’m going to go next door. I will see Kathy. She will obviously laugh. She’ll see this, and it’ll make my day. Someone’s going to acknowledge this cool thing.I go in there. Poor Kathy has to get all the leftovers whenever you can’t get anybody to respond to you. I’ll go see Kathy. So, like, I have to go back, walk through. Oh, shit, here comes Miles again. Yeah, I mean, I don’t know. She’s playing, like, Tetris at her desk or something. There’s, like, nothing going on. I’m like, okay. And I’m like, hey. So I go through the whole story. She’s like, oh, okay, all right. I go, here, look. What does this look like to you? Jesus nope a Big old penis I was so shocked and taken back by this. And how did the rest of your day go? I’m like, I didn’t know what to say because I was not expecting that answer, especially from a woman who should not be talking like that, by the way. She just can’t help it. She’s just telling you what she sees. I know. I’m like, I hope she didn’t think like I Xeroxed off. Everywhere I look, I see penises, Miles.I hope she didn’t think I was, like, you know, Xeroxing off my dork, you know, or something. It certainly isn’t yours. I know. Maybe she thinks I’m sending dick pics to people in person or something. I don’t know. I go, no, no, no, no. I got this new filter on Instagram. It’s called Carpet Blotch, and you take a picture of your dick, and then it makes it look like a carpet. Yeah, right? Yeah. I’m like… No, no, no, no, no. Look at, no, look at closer. It looks like a penis. Okay. I don’t know. You couldn’t leave it at that. You had to press her. Well, then I have to explain the joke, you know, like, well, no, look, I go, there’s the eyes. There’s the mouth. There’s a penis. I go, how do you get a, how do you get a penis out of this? She goes, well, there’s the head, right? And there’s the balls. There’s the shaft. I’m like,Whoa, you are reading… Because it’s a shag carpet, there’s a lot of pubes. Yeah. Yeah. One of those 70s carpets, yeah. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I could not believe this. I’m like, you know, I got to go. I have to leave now. Thank you. You’re like, thank God I didn’t take the left corner. It looks like a cunt. oh, that’s a G-spot. I’m like, oh, what? That’s bubblegum labia. She goes, oh, I can’t wait to tell my husband this funny story. I’m like, no, no, no. Miles came over and showed me a dick pic. Yeah, he’s showing dick pics to everyone. Isn’t he funny? So, yeah. Yeah, if I don’t show up next week, you’ll know I got my ass beaten. Yeah, by the round. I’m like,The good Reverend Gene’s. What was that guy doing again over at the bottle parts store? That son of a bitch. I’m going to go. The funny thing is, so this has happened today, right? Yeah, this just happened today, yes. So then your boss is going to come in. You got the carpet down and everything. He’s going to walk in. He’s going to go, look at that giant penis I got on the floor. I’m not going to say a damn word about the carpet. I’m going to be honest with you. No, he’s going to tell you that, and you’re going to be like, oh. Yeah. Oh, no. Yeah. I’m not even going to acknowledge anything. I’m just like, mm-hmm. Yeah. I’ve learned my lesson. It was like a whole, you know, all I could hear, you know, dun, dun, dun, da-da-da-da, da-da, da-da-da-da. I love it. I love it.Oh, my gosh. He does have pubes for hair. Yeah, well, you know, it’s your almighty or giant phallus. I’m not sure which. I’m not sure. Or it’s both. Yeah. I can already… Is it pointing towards you while you’re sitting in the… Or is it pointed away from you? I guess it’s standing straight up, you know? Oh, really? Yeah. Yeah. I’m like, man, hit the brakes under this carpet here. Gosh, hit the brakes, man. Hold on, man. Did you just get this? It’s awful stiff. Oh my God. Yeah. I just want to lay down and roll around. Come on. You ever lick syrup off a carpet before? I believe in miracles. I want you to take some molly and lay on this carpet, okay? How you going? You sexy thing. So how many pairs of jeans did you buy the other night? Three. I believe it. I’ll take the Jordache. I’ll take the Cavaricis. I’ll take the Gloria Vanderbilt. Cavaricis, yeah.Oh, my goodness. Good golly. What do women talk about? Apparently, she talks about a lot of dicks. I thought after a while, they’d slow down a little bit. I’m like, dang. I don’t know. I don’t know. I did not get that out of this picture at all, man. I’m like, what? If that’s like his pee hole, it’s like on the side of his dick or something. It happens. Born this way. It’s called a 90-degreer. Yeah, I got a 90-degreer. My butt gets wet when I stand up to pee. Like a wacky squirt gun. Oh, wow. Crazy world. Michael, did you have a story you want to share here before we wrap up? I don’t know, man. With your tendonitis issues and your gout issues or whatever you got going on over there, Bob. You got a lot of issues going on over there, buddy. I don’t know, man. And then Miles’ carpet issues or something. Yeah.I will post the picture and you can decide. Send me the picture. It’ll be part of the show art. Yeah, I will. How about you laying on it naked, Miles? Yeah. I have to see these pictures. I just got back to Georgia. I was actually in Charlotte over this past weekend. What an experience that was. What’s that? The Devil Went Down to Charlotte. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, that’s George. You got the wrong fucking song. He was racing cars. Talladega. Ricky Bobby. Oh, God. You’re crazy. No, no. I was there on another production shoot. I had a While running, I don’t know if you guys want to hear about the while running with the over obsessive of hospitality coming from the Airbnb host to the actual weird Hindu of the Uber driver. Look at that rug. It’s got a penis on it. It’s mine. I had an artist do that. Yeah. An actual penis in a rug?How do I draw it on there? Mighty big. Tell us about your Airbnb. Tell us about your Airbnb. Well, the Airbnb was kind of unpleasant when I was first checking in due to the host being overly obsessive with her hospitality. You’d like me to loofah you? I mean, you know, just give me the fucking code, lady, so I can check into my fucking Airbnb, for God’s sake. Oh, my God. I made some fresh brownies for you. Yeah, yeah. No, I mean, she was like going on and on with the fucking goddamn towels. If the towels are not soft enough for you, I can change them over to four-ply cotton. I was like, no, the fucking towels are fine. At this point, it’s too late. Put the good stuff in there. Yeah, right. Don’t wait. Give me the good stuff now. I’m crying, Bob. I’m like, please go into my fucking Airbnb, please. I gotta take a shit. Can we wrap this up? Yeah. Goddamn, lady. I just got in, and I gotta take a shit in your bathroom right now.No, no. She’s like, the towels to the goddamn fucking the linen. She’s like, is the linen softened? I was like, yes. It’s fine. I just want to be in my fucking Airbnb. Leave me the fuck alone, lady. I’m getting very frustrated with her. Oh my god. Other than that, it was an okay weekend. Besides that lady being the best in the fucking world. trying to provide every goddamn service to me in the fucking book. Every service. We got a binder on the coffee table if you’d like to take a look in the price sheet. My weekend sucked, by the way. It wasn’t as happy as yours. I can bring over the towels on natural if you’d like. Oh, God. I can dry you off if you want.What are these ladies related to Miles’ store neighbor there? Maybe. Yeah. I was going to say, are you going to put the Paul Malve in there as well, too, Paul? You got any piercings there, Michael? You want me to take a look at any kind of piercings? I don’t know about all. Well, that’s TMI there, buddy. Too much information. Piercings taste like car keys. Hold on. Before we depart here, I do have to agree with Miles. You’re getting a little too obsessive with these fucking cartoon drawings. You’re getting way too personal. You’re getting way too goddamn personal, man. Jesus Christ. Which one are you talking about? I’ll have to make one of you. You got… You got a male chiropractor trying to give services to mice. He said that’s what happened. What the hell’s going on over there? That was the story. That’s what happened. Yeah. Miles. For the longest time since I’ve known the both of you already, since I’ve been back and forth with your show, I’m actually siding with Miles now. I don’t believe this.Well, this week… Next week, he’s going to have one where we’re going to do a lady in the camp thing with a hot dog, I think, next. I really do. No, no. Bob actually reminds me of the woman that I had to deal with in the crazy fucking Hindu Uber driver this past weekend. He’s like one of these overly obsessive type of people where he would ask me if he did own an Uber. If he did own an Airbnb, sir, it’s everything up to your expertise. Is there anything I should do for you before we… No! Don’t forget to use the dude wipes that are on the windowsill. That’s right. Oh, God. Gotta make sure you have a nice clean ass, for God’s sakes. And on that note, [su_qrcode data=”https://www.staticradio.com/2026/08/31/rug-burn/” title=”Rug Burn” link=”hhttps://www.staticradio.com/2026/08/31/rug-burn/”