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Sticky Nyet
Episode 39
Monday, 21 September, 2026

Miles enjoys his BK breakfast a little too much, while Bob deals with a hungover repairman. GAMES, like old-school games, play a few with the Static Radio twist here – https://www.staticradio.com/category/games/ Subscribe Random Show Click Below https://youtube.com/live/9_Q9VSVkKF0 Miles enjoys his BK breakfast a little too much, while Bob deals with a hungover repairman. Sticky Nyet Bad AI Transcript It’s on. It’s on. It’s on. Hey, you shaved your bush. Hey everyone. This is miles. Thanks for noticing. Thanks. Yeah. It’s always nice to get compliments. Yeah. On the topiary. Yeah. Thanks for showing me. It’s like a bonsai tree. Yeah. Kind of sparse. Yeah. Who says stuff like that? I mean, do you say this in your regular life? No, it’s just a trend that was going on about a month ago. Oh, okay. It’s women, like women talking to women, but they’re using like different inflections. Like you’re mad and you’re surprised and then you’re angry and happy. You know, it’s like, Oh, what is the, what is your fascination with the tech talk? um you know, I’ve not been banned from tick tock before unlike Facebook. I like them. They don’t ban me. Yeah. You know, I just, I’ve like twice now been like in the naughty chair, you know? Yeah. That’s why i don’t really post it on there anymore. The naughty chairI thought you would love to be in the naughty chair. It seems like a place you like to be. I don’t like to be muted like that, no. You can’t silence me. I can say whatever I want. Pull this phone out of my pocket. I’m going over to TikTok where I can say any goddamn thing I want. That’s right. Yeah. Oh, that’s nice. I say let’s murder the Etruscans, and I mean it. a little harsh they’ll kill all of their trust in yourself oh my goodness. Yeah. Anyhow. Yeah. So, uh, well, I’m glad you’re enjoying yourself over on the tick tock i do. I can find like-minded people to hang out with except the live tick tock people they are so boring. Oh, really?People with nothing to do, just sitting there watching their monitors. No, I won’t get naked. No, these are my real tattoos. Miles, quit putting your chats in. I don’t want to read them anymore. I’m going to block you, Miles. Don’t block me. It’s my first fear. I will be silenced. Yeah, right? Yeah. Anyway. any news? I can’t believe you sit and watch that stuff. Oh my gosh. I know. I have no, you wonder you you complain to me like how come you have so much time to make all those goddamn cartoons? And it’s like, well, because i’m not sitting aimlessly watching people. All right. I have a little bit of a thing now with this anyway, because i forget what the name of the picture is, but the,The naked girl in the clamshell, the giant clamshell. I’m in the clamshell nude, like, covering up my whatever. And you’re, like, totally shocked. Yeah. I thought that was funny. I didn’t even read what the captions said. I’m like, I’m not reading this. This is so weird. This is getting so, you know. I went through a phase where I was, like, taking famous artworks and putting our little characters in them. Yeah. Like there’s a good one of Nighthawks, you know, in the diner. That’s a good one. I’m the girl with the pearl earring in one of them. You’re out playing and I’m the girl with the pearl earring. That was a good one. Yeah, I’ve tried hard to be this guy’s friend over the years. It’s not been easy. But I thought, oh, I can’t remember what the name of that was. It’s Venus. I only have like three or four friends left in this world. Unfortunately, this is one of them. Yeah.I’ve tried so hard. I’ll do something else. You want me to do like dogs playing poker or something? No, you’ll probably have me bent over the table or something. I have done nothing inappropriate with your avatar. Me nude in a clamshell covering myself. It’s a classic piece of art. I don’t want to be in it. It’s not you. It’s the snowman. That’s me, yeah. That’s the character of me, yeah. Okay. I can take the picture you have here and put it in there if you want. It’s creepy and disturbing, okay? It’s creepy and disturbing. Oh, come on. You’d be surprised how, you know, you always are on TikTok. You know where I’m at. Yeah, I think I do know where I’m at. I’m on Insta, and they love it over on the Instagram, on the gram.Yeah, no one likes these pictures. Like, nobody. There’s, like, no likes to these pictures at all. Zero. Zero. Every day. It doesn’t mean it’s good, you know? I’m not saying it’s good. I’m just saying it’s there. Because you can doesn’t mean you should. You know what I’m saying? Oh, okay. Okay, let me just give you some tough love. Okay, yes, okay. Let your old Uncle Miles tell you. Yeah, okay. Well, I’m just having fun, and I’m not sitting around mindlessly staring at TikTok. If we agreed on everything, then it would be a boring show. We can’t agree on everything. Yeah, that’s true. Which forms we like and don’t like. Yeah, I don’t know what your hang-up is. It’s just classic artworks. I’m trying to think of other ones. What’s that one with John the Baptist or something? Can you do that?Were you holding the head? Yeah, put my head on. Do that one. I don’t think I want to do that. I don’t want to get into the religious stuff. I have my eyes like X’s. I’m dead. I don’t want to get into religious things. I did actually make one of us in the Sistine Chapel. Did you see that one? As much as I try to avoid it, I’m like… I tried. I can’t even. Well, I’m going to go in a new direction. I don’t know. Maybe I’ll only do Remington pieces from now on. You’re probably like Mapplethorpe or something. Oh, come on now. Now you gave me an idea. Oh, I’m sure you already thought of it. You shouldn’t have mentioned that. It’s so creepy. Even Ted Bundy would be like, God damn.Shit. Well, I’m sorry I’m offending you with our works of art that I’m placing us in. It’s a little weird. It’s a little weird. I don’t know. I think it’s fun. Okay. Speaking of fun, I had some fun over the weekend. Yeah. Or maybe not. So… For reasons that I will not go into, we still have a satellite dish. here at the house. Not one of those big old-time ones. No, no, no. A new, you know, the small one. The small one, yeah, yeah. And something went wrong with it. And unfortunately, something, you know, well, you know how much I hate people coming to the house. Yes, on a scale of 1 to 10. It’s like at least 11 or 12. Yeah, yeah.and so because it wasn’t working right and and couldn’t get it figured out, I had to have them over. Yeah. Which the weird thing was, is we had to wait like a week or something before they came out, which i thought was odd. And then the second odd thing was they came on a sunday Which I’m like, at this point in time, there’s no day of relaxation for anyone. We get packages on Sunday. Amazon will stop by the house on Sunday two, three times sometimes to drop off trinkets. And then now the satellite guy stops by on Sunday. I’m like, what kind of world are we living in? They probably had to fly him in from, like, Ukraine or something. He’s like, all right. You say that, which is funny. Because he was Russian. I knew it. I knew it. So I’m, like, working. I get up in the morning. It’s been godly hot around these parts. So I get up early, and I’m out working in the yard. And this guy, you know, they have a window.show up and it is in the morning. So they’re going to show up sometime before lunch and i’m like well i’m gonna go do some stuff whenever they pull that i’ll you know, stop that and go, you know, do, do my due diligence as the man of the house and, uh, you know, show this guy around or what happened. And, um, so I’m, you know, doing my work and then, and then, i’m I’m mowing some grass and, uh, I’m like, I mean, it’s Sunday. I’m like thinking about this, right? I’m like, God, it’s Sunday. I can’t believe they’re coming on a Sunday. I got nothing to do when I’m mowing the grass, but think about, you know, putting you in a clamshell and, and, uh, you know, and I’m like Sunday, I go, I hope this guy isn’t hung over, you know, what’s that? What is this? Decatur? Yeah. What is this?I did actually, I saw, not on TikTok, but I saw a reel where somebody was listing the 10 worst cities in Illinois, and Decatur was like number five. Right before Danville, I think. Danville was on the list as well. I watched the whole list anyway. Oh, I know. I’ve seen this list before. Aurora was on it too, by the way. Yeah, I know. So, but anyway. I digress. So I’m waiting for this guy to show up. I’m like, gosh, what if he’s hung over? And so then I finished the front yard where I can see people coming and going. So I stopped because I’m like, if I go in the backyard, everybody’s going to be mad at me for not paying attention because I can’t see the driveway and everything. So I’m like, I’ll just go and get something to drink and hang out because he’s supposed to be there. And so…I go in for a few minutes, and then he shows up. And I open the front door, and this guy, I swear to God, he really looked like he was struggling. I want to work on your computer. Exactly. He sounded like Chekhov or whatever. he’s like, uh, the dish and i go yeah yeah and so uh i you know show him okay uh where is uh you know and i go it’s out here. So I’ll take him outside. And I mean, this guy looks like he’s, you know, had about two hours of sleep. This guy’s case in your house. Yeah. Well, No, actually, I don’t think so. He turned out to be a really, really nice guy, but he, you know, I think he overdid it, you know, Saturday. Yeah. And so then, you know, we go outside and I don’t have the dish on the roof anymore. I had it on the roof, but we had some problems and I’m like, you know, get that fucking thing off the roof. This has been years ago now. And so it’s in the yard on a pole andAnd, um, so it’s, he’s like, oh, he was like almost grateful that he didn’t have to get on the roof. Oh, fantastic. You know, and then, uh, he’s like, uh, I think it’s out of alignment or whatever. And he’s getting ready to, undo stuff and everything. No, wait a minute. I go, there’s a, we split, we have a connector, a splice. You don’t have to do everything. You just pull, you know, just, you just have to unscrew over here. Oh, this is great. Wait, is this Waddle from Star Trek? Annie, Annie, good job, Annie. Get that boy a credit. And so he’s like, you know, like I’m making his morning here because he doesn’t have to get on the roof. And now he just unscrews the coax and he can plug into his little device that sees where everything’s, you know, aligned at. And he’s like, ah, and so then, I mean, he’s kind of coming alive now and we’re talking, you know, cause I can’t, I’m like Gavin from kids in the hall, you know,Yeah. I hang around with all the work people and ask them weird questions and, you know, eat seemingly inedible objects for a dollar. And so anyway, he, you know, he’s like, oh, it’s not, it’s move. It move. I’m like, what? How did it move? It’s a pole. Oh, very dry. And then he shows me and just touch the thing. It wiggles. And so He’s like, oh, not good. It has to be, you know. And I mean, honestly, this guy was talking like that. And so then he goes, I have idea. And he takes off to his truck and he comes back and he bodged together this stabilizer thing for the, right? So he took like a mount that you’d put on top of the roof andAnd he drove it down into the ground. First of all, he borrowed all my tools. He’s like, you got a hammer? And I’m like, yeah, I got a hammer. And so basically I was like the tool provider for this guy to watch. But that was fine because he was doing all the work. So he hammers this thing and then he needed a drill bit. I’m like, yeah, I got drill bits. And he basically drilled the thing. And then I even provided my own bolt to hold it all together. But he did all the work and he kind of designed this kind of makeshift thing where he, you know, drove it down into the ground so that it wouldn’t wiggle. Oh, we lost Miles there. Hopefully he’ll be back. Poor guy. Poor guy’s missing this best part of the show. His phone probably died is probably what happened.Oh, there he is. Some Russian guy turned off my phone. Yeah, he came by. Miles is asshole. I shoot his dish. And so he botched together the stabilizing catamaran looking thing for the bottom of my pole so it wouldn’t wiggle, right? Yeah. It was hotter than hell. This guy’s sweating like a dog because I think because he’s still, you know, kind of drunk. And then he gets all that done and we were cleaning up and he’s giving me back all the tools that he borrowed. Isn’t that weird? The guy didn’t bring any of his tools. Well, no, he had, he had what he would normally use, which is basically a pair of pliers and the screwdriver and stuff. He didn’t have like a hammer and he had a drill, but he needed a metal drill bit, which he didn’t have. And I had, I have like a hole.know i got like a suitcase full of drill bits out there. Yeah. So, um, so he just didn’t have these very specific things. Plus he was doing something that really, honestly, he didn’t he could have just said, I don’t know. And you know, it’s out of alignment and you can’t, uh, you know, I can’t do anything for, I’ll align it back up and it’s going to fall back out of alignment, but he went the extra mile. He did the, that, and then he goes, we’re cleaning up and everything. And he goes one moment. I have to show you sound bar. What? Yeah. And I’m like, huh? What? And so he marches, takes all his stuff to his truck and he comes back with this giant box. And he’s like, come on, you know, I’ll show you. And I get a sales pitch for a sound bar.Oh, okay. But he wasn’t like you. He wasn’t like Mr. Hard Sail. He’s like, I have to. Boss says I have to. And then I don’t understand this. And I think it’s kind of bad practice for the dish people. But then he’s like, hold on. You have to talk to my boss. What? So he uses his cell phone. He calls into somebody. And it was like, it was kind of like this FM radio guy. Hey, this is Pete. How was your service today? And I’m like, the guy’s standing like two feet from me at this point, he’s putting away a sound bar. Cause I wasn’t going to buy it. You know what I mean? Yeah. And he, but he wasn’t mad or anything, but he was like, I don’t know. He went through the, went through the motions. Right. Yeah. Yes. Pete, I asked him about sound bar, you know? And, uh, and so, well, great. Great. How was the service? And I’m like,It was, it was good. I’m like, what do you get? What am I going to say? The guy’s standing right here. Yeah. Right. You’re going to like totally put the guy down. Like I think he’s drunk. Yeah. I’m using his phone. Yeah. He’s like literally could like cut my throat, you know? That’s right. Exactly. I don’t know what this guy’s going through right now. His wife was calling him while we were doing all this crazy install. You need to answer that. No, it’s wife. Oh. I’m like, you sure? Yeah, I sure do. Yeah, Pete. Wow, great. Well, we’re so happy you’re a customer. And then I’m like, this is the most bizarre thing. And you’re the 10th caller, so you’re going to win tickets. That’s right. You get free tickets. Double arigato. AndAnd so then, yeah. So then he packs up his stuff and I, you want to water, you know? Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Anything cold. I’m like, well, I can give you a bag of peas. I don’t know. But, uh, I gave him a water and then send him on. Everything works fine and, uh, and everything, but it was just a, it was such a surreal experience to, I’m guessing that there, uh, you know, it’s kind of a, a downward trending, uh, business right now. It’s a dying animal. They just don’t have a lot of people working for him. We had to wait a week to have this guy. I found it really interesting talking to him and everything, but I knew he was kind of struggling there with the day. All in all, he was very nice, even if he had kind of a very…Kurt to delivery, but yeah. How did you know he was actually Russian, though? Well, I didn’t. I was going to ask the question, but I thought better. But he had the accent, and he looked very Slavic. Because you know me, I’ve mistaken Ukrainian people for Russians before, and there are two Ukrainians. Yeah, I know, that’s why i didn’t ask anything. Yeah, don’t ever ask that, because if you get that wrong yeah i don’t want to get involved in the politics of everything yeah so i he could have been Ukrainian, I don’t know but yeah you know yes like the uh if you remember the old seinfeld episode where newman and kramer were playing risk on the train. And, you know, Kramer says Ukraine’s weak. And the guy’s like, I’m Ukrainian. And he starts smashing their board and everything. Oh, geez. Yeah. So, yeah, I wasn’t going to get involved in any of that. But all in all, I was a little bit worried at the beginning. But at the end of it, he was quite the nice guy. And he was not, you know, overly pressuring or anything. But he was…Yeah. And then he’s off and he’s like, oh, six more visits or something like that. And I’m like, oh, that’s a full day, my friend. Yeah. So, yeah. But I’m just like, how weird. He probably liked the nicest neighborhood he was going to be in too. That’s the weird part he’s like you’re probably right. I had to go in like some gang territory next. Like, oh, fuck. I’m heading to East St. Louis. Yeah. I heard there’s a train derailment in Ferguson. Yeah. No, but he was a nice guy. I wish him all the best. He was a hard worker. He didn’t have to do all that. He could have just straightened it out and said, that’s it. I’m done. That was nice. What a nice guy. He put a little effort into it.Uh, given, so anyway, I told, I gave him your address and i said, this guy said miles might want a sound bar uh no my good old buddy miles. He’s always into that kind of stuff. He loves it. So, yeah. So what’s going on with you uh well nothing that exciting god what an exciting life it’s an international uh like a it was almost like, what was that? The terminal. We almost had the terminal. Yeah, I know. Nuclear Western. Yeah. And, uh, you know, I had, uh, about a year ago, I did a story where, uh, a coworker from time to time lets me borrow kind of his piece of shit car, you know? Oh my God. Is that guy still work there? Yeah, he does. Really? Does he still have the same car?Uh, yeah, it’s still, yeah. It’s the one where you almost cut your hand. Yes. Yeah. That’s the one. Yeah. Okay. And, uh, so, uh, I just, I needed an extra car here and there. And he’s like, yeah, go ahead. Okay. What is it with you? And, uh, what you’re like, Hey, uh, can I borrow your, you know, Beretta? Yeah. I’m like, no, no, I’ll give you a ride. You’re not borrowing my car. No, he don’t give a shit. He’s like, take it. I don’t care. It’s insured. Who cares? They pulled us out of the river at one point. So, yeah, go ahead. That’s good. So, I mean, the seats are really comfortable. Nah, it’s all tore up. It’s a piece of shit. So, you know, I like to… Why doesn’t he get a new car? No, he’s got a new car. He’s got a new car. This is his fallback.Oh, this is the second car. Yeah. He’s had it for a long time. It’s a dirty car for doing dirty things in. Yeah. It’s like something you would have driven like 30 years ago. Yeah. What do you mean 30? 10 years ago. And so I don’t I don’t eat breakfast at home because I never leave enough time to do that. So I just like to eat on the road. So I like to eat at work or I should be working. I’m eating. I don’t need to eat. And I knew I shouldn’t have done this because I knew what was going to happen. I go, man, I’m just craving these French toast sticks or Burger King. Oh, my God. Craving this. Mm-hmm. And I go, man, I know I shouldn’t have this, but man, it’s so good. And I go, yeah, you get like a little sealed thing of syrup and you get like five little slices of French toast. Basically it’s like a piece of toast that’s been cut into five, you know? Gotcha. And, uh, not to over-explain it, but anyway, so I’m like, okay, do not.Do not try to eat this in the car. You’ve tried to do this before. Do not do it. Do not do it. Right. You don’t have any facial hair, do you? Not as much as you’d think. Yeah. Yeah. No, I mean, sometimes, I don’t know if you, have you ever had like a beard, like a mustache beard combo? Well, I did grow a mustache last year. Yeah. I thought so. It didn’t look very good. Yeah. Well, and I don’t think it was the mustache. I look like an Artemis Gordon, uh, disguise. It looked like somebody stuck horse hair on my face with some molasses. Yeah. Gorilla mask. And so that little voice, you know, and you’re like, don’t do it. Don’t do it. Okay. I won’t. And halfway there, I’m like, God damn it. I’m doing it. I’m doing it. I’m doing it. Now, if I recall correctly. Yeah.The trip from your house to your office is not that far. I’m assuming that you had to go out of your way to go to this meeting. Yes. Yes, that is true. And halfway there, I broke down. I’m like, okay, I got to do this. So I carefully unzipped the syrup guy, you know. I’m holding it and trying to drive. I’m trying to maneuver or stick. I go, this is stupid. I shouldn’t do this. All I’m seeing in my head is that video of Porkins eating X-Wing fighters. Standing by Red 5. And I’m like, why did I do this? I’m going to have to carefully drive with one hand and hold this open container with my other hand. And I have to make turns and use a turn signal. Of a viscous death that you shouldn’t be eating. I’m like, this is bad. But I’m doing it. I haven’t missed a drop. I’m good.I didn’t eat one. I’ll just wait till I get there. As I’m pulling it, I noticed subconsciously my hand has turned towards me. And now I look and there’s a stream of syrup from the container down between my legs. On the seat or on your pants? It’s on the seat, and now it’s heading downwards towards my chin. I’m like, oh, fuck. At this point, it’s halfway empty. I’m like, oh, fuck. Now you’re sitting in syrup? Yeah, I usually wear jeans, but I wore khakis that day. I’m like, oh. Now they’re discolored. I don’t think I shit my pants or something. I’m like, oh, God. I mean, I had a napkin, but, you know, it’s syrup. You can’t just, you know. Somebody overdid it on the maple sausage this morning. What the hell? I was keeping on my work shirt a little bit. I’m like, oh, fuck. God damn it. Fuck it. I’m trying to get all my stuff together. You know, I’m doing some weird pee-pee dance into the work. And luckily, no one had gotten like that. I’m like, God.You live like two seconds. You didn’t go home and change? No. We were supposed to open pretty soon. I’m like, shit, I got to get in the shop here. Oh, my God. I beeline in the bathroom. I’m dropping trowel to see. I’m like, does it look like I shit my pants? I’m trying to wash it out. I’m getting all the syrup off my legs. It’s in my inner thighs. It’s on my shirt. It’s on my forearm. Is it on your… underpants? It hadn’t gotten that far yet, thank God. It hadn’t soaked up. Yeah, I’m like, jeez. Then I ran outside to clean up the guy’s car. I’m like, fuck, I can’t tell this guy. Oh, that’s right. It’s not even your car. Yeah, it’s not even my car, man. I’m like, fuck. There’s this big stain. It’s sticky. It’s sticky.Can I talk to you, please, about this giant brown stain in my pen? There’s a sticky brown stain here that wasn’t here before. It’s the only Taurus SHO in the Tri-County area. Oh, man, all day. I’m just like, I wouldn’t walk anywhere. I’m like, I’m just sitting down. There’s like maple syrup smell wafting from your crotch. What is that delightful acting thing? Well, it’s funny you should ask. I’m going to start calling you gingerbread man. Run as fast as you can. I’m the gingerbread man. Oh, my God. I did eat the rest of the sticks. Did you happen to, at the end, since you poured so much out, wipe any of them on your crotch before you ate them? No, no. Yeah, I soaked it up in my tank. You’re dunking down there on the seat. I pull up next to somebody and they’re like, what is that guy doing with hisWhat’s he dunking that in? Dunking it on his gonads. What the hell? Behold. Good God. So how’d you clean this seat? I put some paper towels out and I ran outside real fast and I kind of cleaned it up. But I realized later that it was on the steering wheel too. I’m like, oh, fuck. Shit has gone all over the place. It’s all over the radio dials and the heating and air conditioning. The tape deck. The player’s not going to work on this thing anymore. Jesus. Oh, my God. Oh, my gosh. MC Pacer’s ruined. are you? This has happened to you so many times. I know. This is not the first time I’ve made a mess of trying to… You cannot eat this meal in a car while driving. No way. This should be one of those Japanese game show challenges. No way you can do this without making a complete freaking mess. This week on Sticky Balls. Miles’ Cinnabon title is going for…He thinks he’s made it, but oh no, his wrist gives out. He can’t hold that .25 ounces. I don’t know. I don’t know. Subconsciously, I did it. I just started rotating my wrist enough for that. Yeah, I think there was some kind of fantasy going on. You’re like, I wonder… My gonads are stuck to my thighs. I wonder what it would be like. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Hey, ladies. I had tacos last night, and now it smells like farts and maple syrup. Yeah. strange mix of Mexican and Canadian food in here. Kind of like gold bond and syrup. That’s just horrible. Gold bond. That stuff is never going to come off now. [su_qrcode data=”https://www.staticradio.com/2026/09/21/sticky-nyet/” title=”Sticky Nyet” link=”https://www.staticradio.com/2026/09/21/sticky-nyet/”